Disappointments

Tonight I decided it was finally time to get writing, again. It’s been so long and I thought it might do me some good. The problem is that I’m not in a really happy place. I’m feeling sad and pathetic, and found myself wanting to write about disappointment. I know it’s not much of an inspiring topic, but they say you should write what you know.

2017 has been a really tough year. Really tough. And there’s more crappy stuff coming.

My short foray back into my blog and the writing world earlier this year was a short post that wasn't very positive, either.

In my adult life I've really worked hard to find the positive, and to be positive even in tough times. But this year has really challenged me and the challenges keep finding their way into my life. They say bad things come in threes, I feel like I'm in my 10th set of threes and it's hard to find that positive aspect of life.

I want to get this bad stuff out and move on back to positive. So I went online and Googled disappointment, wondering what I might find. And this quote appeared.

“Disappointment is really just a term for our refusal to look on the bright side.” Richelle E. Goodrich

Honestly, I haven't found the bright side, yet. But I'm going to try; to try and get my mojo back, find myself again.. and maybe write something happy and inspiring in the process.

Wish me luck.

What do you do?

What do you write when you aren't inspired or full of a love of life? What do you write when life gives you an unexpected twist that makes it seem somewhat hopeless? I haven't written for a long time and when I have the topics have been upbeat... musings about things, but generally positive. Lately, though, my life has been a series of bumps and twists... good and bad these last five years. And I haven't written much. It's not that the last five years have all been bad. It's just that there's been a lot of bad sprinkled in there.. and then when it's been good I've been taking it all in and haven't written.

I never set out to make my blog a journal. And right now, although many use theirs for that purpose, I'm not sure if that is where I want to go with mine. I don't know if I want to have a public journal, even if I don't name people. But I do know that I miss writing and miss getting my thoughts and feelings out.

What do you think? Should a blog be used as a journal?

Lisa

Art Swarm Fun

Warm hearts

Creative thinking

Creamy paints

Squishy gelli plates

Lucious markers

Sharpened pencils

Waxy thread

Laughter

Meandering books

Exploding pocket books

Meditative Labyrinths

Rich coloured pencils

Smeared book covers :)

Glistening paper beads

Fun book pockets

Expressive stick figures

Sketchbook fun

Friendships forged

Memories made
A happy birthday girl

Art Swarm at the Bee Hive

Posted with Blogsy

Where have I been?

First off,

This blog has mostly been ignored by me these last couple of years. Life events have kept me away from writing and oddly enough, tn purchase of my iPad. I've found it really hard to post via the iPad. I've tried different ways to post from my iPad and haven't had much luck.

So, here I am, again, I still haven't found a good way to post from my iPad, so not sure if it will work, but I will try!

I've just had a wonderful time away, a renewal of sorts.

Sights and sounds of the first day or so of my holidays

Early morning sun on my head,
Golden maple leaves crunch under my feet.
The smell of the forest hangs in the air.
A crisp cool wind nips at my cheeks.

Light flickers on in the Bee Hive,
The heating fan whirs.
Crisp sheets of Canson Mi-tientes feel rich in my hands.
Laughter and chatter as plans are made.

My heart warms as I meet these new friends.
The start of a wonderful week.

Posted with Blogsy

Why?

This afternoon, as I was driving to a friend's for a visit, I saw a young man with a heavy backpack and his arms full of what looked to be books. Snowy rain was falling and he was obviously struggling. I looped around the block and pulled up half a block ahead of him.

I got out of the car, and looked up the block to him, said hi, opened my trunk and pulled out a cloth grocery bag. When I turned toward him he was closer and I smiled and began to say "Can I help you."

He spoke over me and said "I don't want a ride." I said, "Oh, I was thinking I could help you. It looks like you're having trouble and I thought you'd like another bag."

I held it open and he began putting his books inside. I noticed that the reason he'd been holding the bag close to his chest was because it was not only full, it also had a broken handle. As we filled the bag, I asked if I could give him another for the rest of his books, so he could manage better, since the handle was broken. He said no, he would be getting another soon, and this was enough.

All through our exchange he kept on saying "Why?" More than once I simply said it looked like he needed something to carry his books in and I'd wanted to help.

So, what's the big deal?

Well, this young man was also a man with a disability, obvious to anyone who looked at him.

As I drove away, watching him continue on his way, I was struck with an overwhelming sadness. I realized a simple and painful truth. His question of "Why?" had brought that painful truth.

In my own privileged world, of health and what people refer to as 'normal,' an offer of help is welcomed with thankfulness. It's not that I expect it, or assume I deserve it, it's just that it is a part of my life experiences. This young man I'd met, however, did not have this happen as a regular occurrence and as I drove down the street I realized that for him this simple act had been so out of the ordinary that he'd had to ask, why.

 

Posted with Blogsy

Perfection.....or not?

Well, I've been struggling a bit with letting go....letting go and of making things just right....you know, ...perfection.

It's kind of funny, really, because I don't really care if many things are perfect, but the more I delve into the world of art, the more I seem to be looking for perfection. I find myself wanting to discard things that I think aren't perfect, I find myself being more and more critical of the work I am doing.

SOOOOOOOO, I need to let go. I need to breathe and accept. I need to explore the possibilities. If something isn't exactly to my liking, what if it were allowed to become something else? This is what I am striving for, this is my new goal for my art.

Patience is a Virtue....

In The Mummy (first one), Rachel Weisz' character, while trying to decipher some ancient Egyptian is prodded along by her brother. Amidst the chaos of his "hurry up" chatter, she says "Patience is a Virtue" in her British accent and a sing-song voice.

Now perhaps I should be quoting the bible rather than Rachel Weisz, but whenever I am frustrated and start to tell myself to relax, breathe, and have patience, her sing-song voice comes into my head...and it makes me smile.

Today I have been so frustrated, her sing-song voice has been in my head ALL DAY! Luckily I am not sick of it yet....because I've certainly needed that constant reminder.

Patience and I have had a very troubled relationship over the years. Some days, weeks, months, I am just fine and we get along swimmingly. Other times....well not so much. Those are the times when I contemplate physical violence with cartoon ferocity and then I suck in my breath and look for that good old inner strength to sustain me through the moments.

Neuroscience will tell you that when you are stressed blood flow to the frontal cortex is limited...and the frontal cortex is responsible for those reasonable and rational thoughts that we can all be capable of. As the blood is restricted we rely on our mammalian brain....that part nearer the brain stem that tells us to freeze, fight or flee. Apparently I am in the fighting mode!!

Thank goodness there is still some blood flow at the front of my brain or all hell would break lose!!

Just writing about this has brought my blood pressure down and my face out of its grimace... Patience also looks much prettier.

What do you do to stay patient?

The Dance of Life

I've taken a bit of a break for a number of months...not posting regularly. I had a bunch of quotes waiting to be used someday, so I set those up and wandered away.

However, blog or not, life and its lessons have definitely continued. I've had lots of changes in my life these past few months and became frustrated on Saturday when I felt like I'd taken some steps backward in my journey.

I've been mulling the idea of taking steps backward for the last two days...mostly with some frustration. But it just hit me.

Life is like a dance....at least my life. Sometimes I lead, sometimes I am led. Sometimes I don't feel the rhythm of the theme song of the day, other days whatever that 'song' is, my day just goes. I've finally realized that it is ok to take some steps back. Good dancers aren't always stepping forward, after all, that is what makes it a dance.

I like lessons that I discover myself.

Off to dance some more.....

Lisa

Sunrise

Sunrise on a cloudy fall day. A spectacular view for walking the dog! The rain came the next day.

Fall Colours

Walking with the dog on a beautiful fall morning. Sun was shining and the temperature wasn't too cool!

Aquarium

Last week I visited the Vancouver Aquarium.

It was a fascinating visit, from funny fish to the life span of the jellyfish, I sure learned a lot.

One thing I have always wanted to do is swim with dolphins. Obviously you can't swim with them at the aquarium, but there was something heart stopping about seeing them in person.

My first response was an absolute ache in my heart, to think that they lived in captivity. Later, we caught the dolphin show. I began watching with some very mixed emotions. Part of me was excited, the other felt like I was about to witness a car crash....you look, but with dread.

Fortunately, very quickly into the show they explained that the 4 dolphins had been rescued and had been deemed unreleasable. My relief was palpable, and I began to enjoy an amazing show of intelligence and athleticism.

Congratulations to the aquarium for creating a healthy, clean and safe space for their inhabitants.

What Did You Do This Summer?

Every fall the kids go back to school and inevitably there is some teacher who gives them a writing assignment titled "What I Did This Summer"

As a former teacher, I've got to tell you that those assignments are the worst to read, too! No matter how fun the summer was, a list of events just isn't all that exciting.

So, what am I going to do? Write about my summer. :)

It's been a great summer of terrific weather, but I've actually spent very little time enjoying it.

What have I been doing?

I've just spent the busiest summer of my life working 10 and 12 hour days...working on the most significant project ever with an unbelievably tight deadline. The funny thing is, even though it was a lot of work and not much time in the sun, I don't begrudge it.

A few years ago I may not have felt this way, and I certainly wouldn't want to spend every summer this way. But, with no kids at home and some challenging work, it really has been a great summer.

Now that I'm done, I do need a break and some sun!

I also need to get blogging!

Happy summer!

It's HOT outside!

It seems to me that most of us spend our winters complaining about the cold and the minute it gets hot for more than a couple of days, we begin to complain about the heat!
Now, I am actually a cold weather girl. Which is good, considering where I live. However, these last few days are one I am appreciating. It may be too hot for my sun sensitive skin, limiting my time outside, but the ground is drying up, the mosquitoes are too drowsy to fly, and the farmers who were able to get their crops in are seeing great progress.

I'm not used to the humidity we've had, which is another reason I'm really enjoying the heat.

So, this hot spell won't be leaving a sunburn on my skin, since I won't be out there a lot, but there's nothing like hot lazy days to let you know summer is REALLY here!

Live in the Present

You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present. Jan Glidewell

The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post. L. Thomas Holdcroft

The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind. William Blake

To all who get stuck in the past. Been there, done that, come have fun in the present with us!

Talking Dogs

No matter how many times I watch this it makes me laugh! Enjoy!

Blogging from My iPad

This my first entry done from my iPad. If I can make this work, I'm going to be a happy camper!

So, here's some text and a picture!

Thank good ness for the app called Blogsy, it made it work!

Etsy

Have you ever visited the Etsy site? Etsy is a site dedicated to allowing people to buy and sell handmade items, supplies for making their own, as well as to purchase vintage articles. I've found some great supplies for my new book binding habit on this site. http://www.etsy.com/index.php.

Ifyou are interested in purchasing anything from a knot pipe light to tissue poms to art to a vintage sewing pattern or an antique steamer trunk. The choices are unlimited and while some are pretty crazy, some are also pretty fun.
 

If you click on any of the pictures it takes you to ETSY to see their listings.

Long Weekends

The best part of a long weekend is the ability to sleep in....and to have an afternoon nap. If you're lucky you also get to have a pajama day, or just do whatever it is that makes you happy...because you've got that extra time. If the sun and the weather are just right you can even lay in the hammock.

Too bad we couldn't have a long weekend every weekend.

2 Nights of Elton John

A few posts ago, I mentioned my long time love Elton John's music. This week I was able to attend two Elton John concerts!

Both nights were fantastic. Ever the consumate performer, he played for more than 2 and a half hours. Everyone has a different opinion as to what their favourite thing is. For me, it was everything. I love his jazzy/bluesy improv, his piano playing that is amazing, and of course, the ability to sing along with his music.

signing autographs

I took a few pictures with my cell phone. Here they are!

Oh, and on the second night I was in the second row!

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers I know...step-mothers, honourary mothers, pet mothers!

Here's a crocus that popped out of an area of our yard that is under construction. I didn't realize it would survive the digging and layer of new dirt, along with some leaves that still need to be cleared out. But, here it is!